How I Learned to Meditate: My Journey to Mindfulness

Kathleen in a green shirt looking to the left smiling | Kathleen Killen Psychotherapy and Coaching

When I was growing up, my dad had a book on his bookshelf called Full Catastrophe Living by Jon Kabat-Zinn. Little did I know then that Jon Kabat-Zinn was a pioneer in bringing mindfulness and meditation to the West, and the founder of Mindfulness Based Cogitive-Therapy (MBCT). Even as a kid, I was curious about the book and would take it down occasionally, flipping through its pages to learn what it meant to be in the present moment. Although I didn't practice meditation back then, those moments were my first introduction to the idea of mindfulness.

Throughout my teens, twenties, and early thirties, I travelled extensively, immersing myself in different cultures around the world. These travels were incredible in so many ways, but one of the most profound lessons I learned was the power of prayer and mindfulness. In many of the places I visited, I saw how prayer was not just a religious ritual but a form of deep, intentional focus. It often involved repeating mantras—words or phrases that helped people centre themselves, which, I later realized, was closely tied to the principles of mindfulness. This exposure planted seeds in me, and I began incorporating small bits of these practices into my life. But at that stage, it was still more of a passing interest than a committed practice.

It wasn’t until my early twenties that I began a formal meditation practice and truly saw my life start to transform. Around this time, I was dealing with the typical challenges that come with being in your twenties—stress, uncertainty about the future, and a constant whirlwind of thoughts that never seemed to slow down. Though I didn’t know it at the time, I was grappling with anxiety, had undiagnosed ADHD and was struggling with addiction. I realized I needed something to help me feel more grounded and focused, so I turned to meditation.

The real turning point came when I started my yoga teacher training. This experience took my understanding of meditation to an entirely new level. It was as if my world had gone from fuzzy and unclear to finally seeing things in high definition. I began to recognize that meditation wasn't just about sitting quietly; it was a tool for gaining clarity, tuning into my inner world, and connecting with myself and others on a much deeper level.

I also started to notice significant improvements in my mental health. Meditation became an anchor that helped calm my anxiety, manage many of the symptoms of ADHD, and develop a more compassionate relationship with myself. It was as if this practice allowed me to create a little more space in my mind, making it easier to navigate life's challenges without feeling overwhelmed.

The most surprising thing I learned was how simple it could be to start. I used to think meditation meant sitting for hours on end with an empty mind, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. In reality, my journey began with just one or two minutes of focusing on my breath—simply paying attention to the sensation of my inhale and exhale. Those first few minutes of stillness were incredibly challenging, but I quickly realized that consistency was the key. The more I practiced, the easier it became to stay present and focused. The more I practiced consistently, the more my emotional reactivity subsided, the more choice I felt I had in my life, and the better life became.

Meditation isn’t about doing it perfectly; it’s about showing up, even on the days when your mind feels like a storm of thoughts. Over time, those one or two minutes grew into five, then ten, and eventually became a part of my daily routine. It’s amazing how such a simple practice can have such a profound impact on every aspect of your life.

Looking back, I can see how all the pieces of my journey—the book on my dad's shelf, the lessons I learned from different cultures, and the experiences I had during my yoga teacher training—came together to guide me toward meditation. It’s not an overnight transformation, but it’s one that has brought so much clarity, peace, and balance to my life. And it all started with a few moments of stillness focusing on my breath.


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